ලියුං කියුං කටිං කෙරුං

I thought of writing this in something similar to පුස්වෙඩිල්ල ස්ටයිල් as it amuses me that much.:D

Once අපෝන් a time in a විලේජ්, there were 2 ගමේ කොල්ලෝස් teams who used to play ක්‍රිකට්.Here one ගමේ කොල්ලා played so well, that මිනිහා was offered ද කැප්ටන්සි ඔෆ් one team නිතරඟයෙන්. In his ටීම් however, was another කොල්ලා from එහා ගමක්.මිනිහා too was an old එකා in the team but not much ජනප්‍රිය or skilled.But he was an අණ්ඩපාලයා too, so never showed how much ඌ envied the Captain ලොක්කා..Instead he always was holding පන්දම් to the Captain ලොක්කා, saying ""ලොක්කා මගේ දෙයියා".

So there was another ටීම් එකක් නොහ්! අන්න that was a නියම team. Their ලොක්කා was a නළුවෙක් නෙවෙයි මොළයක් so he was the unbeaten captain from තොටිල්ල to බොරැල්ල.His වයිස්-කැපා struggled a lot to get a ප්‍රොමෝෂන් එකක් but all his battles were in vain නිකං. So this මොළ ලොක්කා was very much in disgrace as they were beaten continuously by the Captain ලොක්කා's team ආයේ ඇපත් නැතිවෙන්න.So this මොළ ලොක්කා for the second match, decided to දෙන්න බැටේ මෙදා සැරේ and brought පහළ ඇළේ කිඹුලා මැරූ කොල්ලා සරත් who was well-known for පොල්-අඩි, into the team and challenged the Captain ලොක්කා..Captain ලොක්කා was so cool like Arjuna අයියා @ 1996 World Cup and let සරතා to open his culvert mouth as much as he could, knowing it would make him තාර බිත්තරේට අවුට් වෙන්න. So that match was වැඩක් නෑ..

Then came another match, where Captain ලොක්කා was still the opponent. This time the team requested the මොළ ලොක්කා to not to asking and eating for the love of God and to look for another ප්ලෑනක්.

     Oops forgot නොහ් ඉතින්! 
    දැන් those two teams play කරගෙන කරගෙන යන කාලේ there was one කෙල්ල කුසුමා in the Captain ලොක්කා's team.Though she was asked to stay at home after her කොටහළු මංගල්‍යය, she so envied the people who still played without her in the field.But for අවාසනාවකට she was asked to ගෙදර වැඩක් පලක්, මැහුමක් ගෙතුමක් කරගෙන ඉන්න while the කොල්ලෝස් played.One day, අපේ මොළ ලොක්කා got a brilliant idea as usual and went to see කුසුමක්කා who was living a life full of hatred, risking ළපටි රූපේ ඈගේ too to be ruined like hell.මොළ ලොක්කා shared the grief and pain with කුසුමක්කා and at the end of their සුහද හමුව came up with a මාස්ටර් ප්ලෑනක්.Then තමයි ගේම පටාආආආන් ගන්නේ..! From that day onwards there were lots of lots of සුහද හමු under බඩවැටි, පඳුරු වැටි, අර වැටි & මේ වැටි..මොළ ලොක්කා & කුසුමක්කා ඔහොම හිටියට මරු fishermen නිසා සිරී කොල්ලා ඔෆ් our Captain ලොක්කා's team was බාගත්තා nicely. However, සිරී කොල්ලා was too excited and his ආප්ප appetite was increased. 
මොළ ලොක්කා thought before මූ අනානාස් ද බනානාස් කුසුමක්කා  should take the full control over සිරී කොල්ලා. කොහොමින් කොහොමහරි, සිරී කොල්ලා was convinced to leave Captain ලොක්කා and join මොළ ලොක්කා.කුසුමක්කා who was now in a cheer leader costume going against all සම්ප්‍රදායස්, backed his decision and continued to act as the chief adviser for සිරී කොල්ලා with the support of වේලු ඇන්ඩ් මොහමඩ්.ඉතිං ඊටපස්සේ after a very unpredictable battle, මොළ ලොක්කා's alliance has won the match! As per the initial plans, සිරී කොල්ලා became the ලොක්කා and මොළ ලොක්කා නිතරඟයෙන් became the වයිස්-කැපා. 

Let's see what our  Captain ලොක්කා did then. He has lost the match. So as any ලොක්කා would do, he stepped-down from the captaincy. Now the Captain ලොක්කා's team was in chaos. Some said "අඩෝ  Captain ලොක්කා should now RIP! We have a new captain" and another said "තොට පිස්සුද යකෝ! whatever happens Captain ලොක්කා is our Captain අදත් හෙටත් මතුවටත්!".So the team එක ඇතුළේ වලි පිට වලි & සිරි රජ සිරි! සිරී කොල්ලා looking at this මණ්ඩලේ කචල්, sent a SMS to Captain ලොක්කා "මචං I need the captaincy of my previous team too, it's high time for you to go home and මලක් ගහලා relax".So Captain ලොක්කා first thought මොන මගුලක්ද යකෝ මේක but then again thought of accepting සිරී කොල්ලා's request.So now සිරී කොල්ලා has become the unbeaten captain of both the teams and කොල්ලෝස් & ලොල්ලෝස් both were very much confused when a ගමේ එකෙක් asked them "සිරාවටම කෝකද බං සිරි කොල්ලා'ස් team එක?".As mentioned earlier සිරි කොල්ලා was another අණ්ඩපාලයා. So he said "No මචං I am representing the සම්පූර්ණ ගම so it will not be ethical for me to be one team's representative".So the ගම්මු gave a සාධුකාරයක් and continued to තමුන්ගේ වැඩක් බලාගන්න. 

After some time, there came another match. 
You know ක්‍රිකට් නොහ්! You just can't play a match once in a blue moon and stay home නොහ්! 
So සිරී කොල්ලා who is now called Captain සිරී summoned both teams and said ""මචං we are to play another match". All nodded in agreement but no one dared to ask which team he would lead.කොහොමහරි knowing that it would come to such a point, Captain සිරී said "මචංs I am not gonna play this time nor lead. So you all play I'll watch".  Captain ලොක්කා's previous team except the ones who favored සිරී went straight to Captain ලොක්කා and requested him to lead the team at this match.Captain ලොක්කා had no issues but Captain සිරී went into a rage upon this news.He quickly summoned the team and said "අඩෝ කැත වැඩ කරන්න එපා ඩෝ..මමයි දැන් කැපා උඹලා වැඩ කරන්න ඕන මම කියන විදියට මිසක් අරූ කියන විදියට නෙවෙයි නොහ්!"කියලා.Then the members said "මෙහෙමයි මචං, you said you will not support or lead any of the teams.Captain ලොක්කා on the other hand, is still capable of leading us and ගම්මු too like him. So ඇයි බැරි?" This had Captain සිරී thrown into a fit of rage and he quickly ran to meet කුසුමක්කා who was still in that cheerleader costume හංදියේ කඩේ දාං අතක් අදිමින්.Seeing Captain සිරී's reddened face and fury, she quickly understood that the rumours have now turned into a real shit.Then there was a bloody කඹ ඇදිල්ල between සිරී fans and ලොක්කා fans but finally the suggestion to bring Captain ලොක්කා again to the field has won.Captain සිරී was so butt-hurt to see the support Captain ලොක්කා has got, and thought of slandering him through an appeared-to-be-fair speech.But Captain සිරී got the බනානාස් ටු අනානාස් and revealed his true intentions to be චාටර් by telling ගම්මු in public that the Captain ලොක්කා is going to කෙයන්න ලයන්න කරගන්න මෙදා සැරේ.Oh! pity on this fella, this was backfired and made ගම්මු furious so they told him "It's okay baby, දැන් පලයං". So knowing that all his plans are වතුරේ now,  Captain සිරී thought of maintaining a low profile for a while.But it was always හෙන අවුල් for මිනිහා to see the support Captain ලොක්කා still gets and his fame.So he thought of writing a ලියමනක් instead of SMS. After having ආප්ප විත් හකුරු for dinner, the ideas started flowing down from his අග්න්‍යාශය.Finally a letter was written limited to only 4-5 pages.Having sent the letter via post, Captain සිරී spent his whole day biting his toe nails, sitting like a දුකුලා on a Damro Recliner but no reply was sent to him until the very next day.Captain සිරී was overjoyed at first when he saw the returned mail but soon found himself in tears and utter pain, seeing a පුංචි කරදහි කෑල්ලේ ලියමන from the Captain ලොක්කා giving no damn to සිරී's resentment.

So now Captain සිරී has booked seats to watch the finals with කුසුමක්කා desperately hoping for the මොළ ලොක්කා to beat Captain ලොක්කා..! 
Hail සිරී!